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They'll never go home again



Why do women work? Many people seem to believe that women work because they have to. The economy is lousy, so it takes two incomes for a family to survive.

Other people seem to believe women work because our values are all screwed up. Our lust for material goods has driven Mom out into the workplace at the expense of a peaceful, balanced family life.

No wonder working women are filled with angst. They’re constantly told they’re supposed to feel guilty (for shortchanging their kids) or angry (at husbands who shirk their half of the housework). Every time they pick up a magazine they find yet another confessional tale by someone who’s ditched her glamorous, high-powered career to go back home and bake cookies for her neglected kids.


Contrary to the prevailing mythology, the real reasons women work have very little to do with need or greed. They work because they want to, and because they can.

Nearly every woman who works knows what she gets out of it: independence, self-esteem, a sense of competence. She gets the chance to choose her own life (and her own man, or no man). This is true whether she's a vice-president or a data-entry clerk, a sales manager or a telemarketer. Women have known forever that a pay cheque – a job of one's own – is the most powerful instrument of liberation there is.

The other liberating force is technology. It is controversial to say so, but technological advances have all but abolished housework. Women aren't needed at home any more because the job of housewife has ceased to exist.

As proof, I submit the household of my grandmother, circa 1935.

Grandma (who also had a job as a nurse) ran a typical house in a typical American town. Unlike many country people, her family had electricity, running water and indoor plumbing. They also had a modern stove, fuelled by gas rather than coal or wood. Even so, the house got dirty fast (no air filters) and was hard to clean (no vacuum cleaners.)

Running a house was full-time hard labour. Housewives made all the meals from scratch (no frozen food: no freezers). Grandma baked her own bread and cakes and, during the summer, fed the family from the vegetable garden. She got her eggs from the neighbour, who kept chickens. She kept the meat and milk in the icebox, which was serviced by a man in a horsedrawn cart. The food stayed as cold as the melting lump of ice.

In September, the family ate leftovers while Grandma spent a whole week preserving her peaches, tomatoes and beans. Back then, putting up food for the winter was not a lifestyle option.

Monday was washday. Grandma used a wringer washer and a washboard. Other families boiled their whites in a big tub in the back yard. (No detergent, no bleach. People used soapflakes.) After she wrang out the clothes, Grandma hung them on the line to dry. Plenty of families ate baked beans on Monday because the washing took all day.

Tuesday was ironing day. (Non-crease fabrics hadn’t been invented.) Some houses had a mangle for the sheets, but Grandma did them by hand. She took special care with Grandpa’s shirts. (He liked a clean, crisp, starched shirt every day.) Housewives without electricity did the job with flat irons heated on the stove. Women who did not wash on Monday and iron on Tuesday were thought to have something wrong with them.

Home was a dangerous place then. Beans, if not canned properly, gave your family ptomaine poisoning. Women got their arms caught in wringers and mangles. My mom was scalded once when a jar of boiling tomatoes exploded.


Grandma was an expert seamstress. She made all my mother's clothes and many of her own. She turned her husband’s shirt collars when they were frayed, and darned the family socks.

My mother tasted her first Birdseye frozen peas when she was eight. About that time, my grandmother acquired a Sunbeam Mixmaster. It was the beginning of the technological revolution that would sweep away the drudgery of a housewife’s life forever.

Processed food, refrigerators, microwave ovens and wash-and-wear fabrics have altered our world as profoundly as the automobile or the microchip. Today, any family can manage home-maintenance chores in an hour or two a day, and the only time it makes sense for a parent to stay home is when the kids are young. (Technology is not likely to abolish the need for parents.)

There are entire industries devoted to maintaining the illusion that homemaking is still a full-time job. Martha Stewart (the only individual who still keeps chickens) has turned it into an extravagant fantasy of pseudo-creative expression. And idle housewives can take their pick of dozens of made-up arts and crafts, from wreathmaking to decoupage. But it’s all pretend. The housewife’s job as we've known it for hundreds of years is gone for good – and good riddance.

That’s the real reason why women have gone out to work, and why they'll never go home again.

Dirk Comble. For a Change. 2001

 

There are really only two differences ...

There are really only two differences between men and women that we know to be completely natural and unavoidable and that affect the jobs they do: men, on average, have stronger muscles than women; and women give birth to babies. All other differences that we may observe are increasingly held to be the result of training and fashion, and not something inborn and inevitable.

This means that the traditional role of women as housewives, who perform the tasks of cooking, bringing up children, cleaning etc. as against the male role of going out to work, looking after the money side, fighting for 'hearth and home', etc. are now often thought to be purely the result of custom: men may be just as good at looking after babies once they are born, doing the housework, and all the other things considered to be women's jobs in most countries today, and women may be just as good at earning the family's living, handling the accounts, fighting when necessary, and so on. Many men and women have proved that they can perform tasks traditionally reserved for the opposite sex.

If from their earliest years children see their mother doing one sort of work, and their father another; if they also see all their friends' parents having the same distribution of labour; and if little girls are encouraged to play with dolls, sew,
cook and avoid dirty and dangerous amusements, while their brothers are en­couraged to play with toy trains and toy soldiers, to make model aeroplanes, climb trees, play football, etc. they are being brainwashed into accepting that men and women have very different roles to play in society, and into believing that they have these different roles because each is more suited by nature to the one or the other.

In days gone by, and in some countries still, physical strength is important: if everything is made, farmed, mined, etc. by hand, and there is sometimes fighting to be done with primitive weapons, obviously the stronger one is, the better. But even in ancient times there were female fighters – the Amazons – who were very successful against men; and in countries like the USSR and Israel today, one finds a lot of women doing hard physical work, for example on railway tracks. In the USA women are trained to fight in the same way as the men, in the armed forces, and in the army especially.

But in any case in the modern world physical strength is far less important than it used to be. One needs strength to control four big horses pulling a carriage, but practically none to drive a modern motor-car with power-assisted steering and brakes. One needed a lot of strength to fight with a sword or spear, but a rifle, a machine-gun and a rocket-launcher need very little.




Because strength was of such importance in the old days, men could easily dominate women and divide roles out as it suited them. women needed the protection of men, and also depended on them to a large extent for hunting the animals which they needed for their food. Now, however, it is skill and brain power that are important, and women have those to the same degree as men.

Working mothers

 

Today 60 per cent of all American women work outside their homes. This is a big change for the United States. Only 40 years ago 75 per cent of all Americans disapproved of wives who worked for wages when their husbands could support them financially. Today most people accept that many women work outside the home.

There are two reasons why mothers and wives work. One reason is that there are many opportunities for women. A woman in the United States can work at many jobs, including an engineer, a physician, a teacher, a government official, a mechanic or a manual laborer. The other reason women work is to earn money to support their families. The majority of women say they work because it is an economic necessity.

About 80 per cent of women who work support their children without the help of a man. These women often have financial difficulties. One in three families in the United States headed by a woman lives in poverty. Many divorced Americans are required by law to help their former spouses support their children, but not all fulfill this responsibility.


A wife’s working may add a strain to the family. When both parents work, they sometimes have less time to spend with their children and with each other.

In other ways, however, many Americans believe that the family has been helped by women working. In a recent survey, for example, the majority of men and women said that they prefer a marriage in which the husband and wife share responsibilities for home jobs, such as child rearing and housework.

Many teenagers feel that working parents are a benefit. On the other hand, when parents have younger children, who require more time and care, people's views are more mixed about whether having a working mother is good for the children.

What happens to children whose parents work? More than half of these children are cared for in daycare centers or by babysitters. The rest are cared for by a relative, such as a grandparent. Some companies are trying to help working parents by offering flexible work hours. This allows one parent to be at home with the children while the other parent is at work. Computers may also help families by allowing parents to work at their home with a home computer.

Cella Hall. For a Change. 2001

 

 


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