Архитектура Аудит Военная наука Иностранные языки Медицина Металлургия Метрология Образование Политология Производство Психология Стандартизация Технологии |
Life's crap .. I come to love him.
GAY MALE I think Clifton has his finger up America's... (he's bleeped) LITTLE OLD LADY (wearing hearing aid) I enjoy the way he sings. CLOSEUP - MIKE WALLACE'S FACE MIKE WALLACE Well, whatever the reason... one thing is for certain... Tony Clifton is a box office sensation... As a matter of fact, I'd better hurry, The show's about to start. Camera opens up to reveal Wallace in peach colored tuxedo. MIKE WALLACE This is Mike Wallace... CBS News. Good night. DISSOLVE TO INT. DODGER STADIUM - NIGHT The stadium is empty and dark. Just a few hours before, Tony had just finished performing to 55, 000 screaming fans. Now he's on stage... alone. Feeling melancholy, he approaches a piano and starts to plink out a melody. With no one around, his singing isn't all that bad. TONY (singing) “In me you see a man alone behind The wall he's learned to call his home. A man who still goes walking in The rain expecting love again. In me you see a man alone drinking Up Sunday's and spending them alone. A man who knows love is seldom what it seems. Just other people's dreams.” (speaks) Anna, I miss you so much. Tony hears a sound. TONY Hey! Who's there? CUT TO ANOTHER ANGLE - THE STADIUM ANDY No one, Tony... just me. TONY Oh, Mr. Kaufman, it's you. (embarrassed) I was just practicin' the old Piano here. Playing this stupid Song. You didn't hear me, did ya? ANDY No, Tony, I didn't hear you. (changing subject) Hey, shouldn't you be in bed? You know tomorrow's a big day. Not every day a performer gets to Entertain at the White House. TONY Oh yeah. I suppose that means somethin'. ANDY Tony, is there something on your mind? If there is, you can tell me. TONY Well, it's nothin' important, Mr. Kaufman.It's just that... there's this chick I know... and I've been so busy lately... that I haven't had a chance ta... ANDY See her! TONY Yeah. ANDY No problem, Tony... I'll take care of it. TONY (childish excitement) Ya will? ANDY Sure. Just leave it all to me. What's her name? TONY Anna Fingerhut. She lives in Philly. She works at da Paradise Massage Parlor. ANDY (trying not to laugh) A massage parlor? She could come visit When you're taping your special next week. TONY Ya mean it? But what if she has ta work? ANDY Just leave it all to me, Tony. I'll call her up and make her an offer... I mean explain the situation. TONY Ya will? ... Why thank you, Mr. Kaufman. I don't know what I'd do without ya. Here's her phone number. Tony hands card to Andy. ANDY Now get some sleep. TONY Yes, sir. He starts to leave. ANDY Oh, Tony, just a minute. (hands him papers) Here's a few ideas that should go Over real well at the White House. TONY Anything you say, Mr. Kaufman. Thanks for everything. Good night. He leaves. ANDY Good night, Tony. Kaufman walks to the piano and starts to play -- he imitates Tony singing. ANDY “In me you see a man alone behind The wall he learns to call his home. A man who still goes walking in the rain expecting love again.” He runs his fingers across the whole keyboard. ANDY Sentimental slob. EXT. THE WHITE HOUSE - ESTABLISHING INT. WHITE HOUSE - GUESTS are being seated... lights go down. Out walks the President of the United States. Much applause. PRESIDENT Good evening, Senators, Congressmen, Mr. Vice President and especially a Warm welcome to our guests for the Evening, the Delegation from the People's Republic of Red China. Applause. We see the Chinese Delegation seated in front, bowing to the introduction. PRESIDENT Tonight's entertainment, I must confess, I've never had the pleasure of viewing Before, but I'm told that he's the latest Rage. I do know he's received more press Than yours truly. Polite presidential laughter. Interpreters fill in Red Chinese, who laugh. PRESIDENT So, it's a pleasure to welcome my guest This evening at the White House, Mr. Tony Clifton. Applause. Out walks Tony in his familiar outfit. He is wearing a set of Jerry Lewis “Chinese teeth”. TONY Thank you, Mr. President, Senators, Congressmen, and you short people down front. |
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